Діалог в курілкі

В ліфті, зустрівши двох колег з аудиту, що працюють у тій же будівлі:

Me: Vous fumez beaucoup
R: Tu fumes beaucoup aussi
Nous sourirons.

У паркінгу, де курілка:

R: That’s a nice box!
Me: Yes, I know. I don’t want to look at these stupid signs and pictures. ‘Cause, it gets on your nerves, it accumulates in your brains. If you like to smoke, if you are drug addict, just enjoy it, you know. If you keep on looking on that shit eventually you will get it.
R: Here is how I look at it. We are actually doing good for the economy. If you think about it. If all the people all over the world quit smoking that’s all cigarettes producers go bankrupt. That’s unemployment for all of them.
Me: Yes, that’s a decrease in CIT, excise duties to the states and the governments.
R: Yes, people will all live longer. Yes, and what about the doctors. They all loose jobs, too.
Me: Yes, that’s the burden to the pension and retirement schemes.
R: So, we all contribute to pension schemes. And after all we will not even use our pensions.
Me: I can see you are an auditor.
R: I prefer a consultant, because you bring a solution, not just reporting.

Conclusion: The government needs you to smoke. You buy products from cigarettes producers. You, and only you as a final consumer, pay excise duties included in the price of cigarettes. You pay for their CIT and VAT. For their payroll costs. For the advertisement that is brought down to you in your brain via big boards, fancy stupid magazines about luxury life with rotten teeth and диряві lungs. Keep it up. The government needs you. Good job, animal – you keep so many industries running. Enjoy!